|
Your description here Tagboard here Link Link Link Link Link Link Link Link February 2003 March 2003 April 2003 May 2003 June 2003 July 2003 August 2003 September 2003 October 2003 November 2003 December 2003 January 2004 February 2004 March 2004 April 2004 May 2004 June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 December 2004 January 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 September 2006 October 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 June 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 December 2007 July 2008 March 2009 Host: Blogger Software: Adobe Illustrator CS 2, Macromedia Flash Pro 8 Layout © Xavqior
Thursday, July 31
My Beloved The very first time I saw you I knew it was meant to be I'd never let you leave me side I would never set you free But days went by and you had left When I awoke, you were not there I tried my best to move on without you But nothing seemed to compare For it was my own fault you left I had become very obesessive It was my fault, my love for you Had become so very agressive Because every morning it was you I wanted But one day you were gone I lived without you long enough I needed you at the stike of dawn I left my house and drove around But luckily, you found me I spent my morning alone with you Until you were gone, my precious coffee.
2:43 PM
Tuesday, July 29
My awoken slumber its a dark and stomy night And im overcome with fright I lay awake, tossing and turning Inside, my heart is burning Frustration sets the tone Yet again, I am all alone This stormy weather is not my friend But I hear it calling my name And even though its not my friend i follow, all the same For it was me this voice was luring And I dont know what else I'll be enduring It pulls me deeper and deeper until It tells me Im not to be so sad and ill The only light is the moonlight beaming I wonder if in fact Im dreaming So now the louder are those voices I look around, with minimal choices I beg and plead and fall on my knees I beg and plead for them to set me free But on this dark and dreary night My fear soon turns to their delight They laugh and laugh as my face goes pale And begin to tell me a creepy tale The voices tell me what is to come And as they finish, I turn numb For they had said I would die today And that was why they'd lured me away The voices said that my life was off track They told me it was God that I did lack Quietly now, they spoke to me, glaring Finally a reason, they were sharing And in my shame I went back to bed I lay and cried, but it wasnt tears that I shed It was blood that spilled out, instead That night I died, as the voices said The last thing they shared, was that I was born again.
11:20 PM
Monday, July 28
Spiral Paper All I see is an empty page Plain white and clean The lines running across the paper Seeming to capture my screams Ive attempted in using the paper thats rare But I have found that it doesnt compare For nobody knows me like you do With your boring lines of grayish blue And it was you who kept my secrets You comforted me in my greatest sorrow Youve accepted me and the way I am And given me hope for a better tomorrow Throughout the pain and moments of glory You have been there to hear my story For you have provided line after line And just for that I give you my time But I cant help but wonder what you'd have said If I'd chosen some rare paper instead It is you, my paper, that I hold close to my heart I can only hope that we wont ever be apart.
10:04 PM
Sunday, July 27
Reaching for nothing Reaching for a hand Nobody seems to care I cant reach any further Nobody is there It hurts, having to reach so far I wish you were near Where are you? Why is it me that you cant seem to hear? All I need is for you to reach out Show a sense that our friendship is alive Do memories mean nothing? I just hope our friendship will survive Im sick of reaching to the past I dont want to be on my own I thought you were worth the effort I suppose I'll just stay alone.
11:51 PM
Mad at Me Im mad that nobody seems to care Im mad that thier problems do not compare Im mad that I am all alone Im mad that nobody could have known Im mad that everything is all my fault Im mad that my life is at another halt Im mad that I have caused such pain Im mad that Im always the one to blame Im mad that Im such a rotten friend Im mad that its hard for me to pretend But most of all Im mad at me Im mad that I am just falling debris.
12:22 PM
Friday, July 25
Forever Friend's proper goodbye I never thought I'd see the day That it was you, who went away I thought that we'd be forever friends I thought it'd be that way 'til the end But you've moved on, and dont need me anymore You've moved on, and shut this door So now Im left with all this pain that Im sure you didnt intend I only wish that you would continue to be my forever friend Theres so many stories that I havent shared Now Its me wishing that it was you who cared Im left with these tears, that I have to cry My only wish, is for a proper goodbye.
10:56 PM
Monday, July 21
A Foggy Night Whenever the rain clouds come to play My life becomes this weary gray Everywhere around I see Something crashing as falling debris The thunder roars and brings out my fears My life crumbles into tears The lightning strikes and sends down pain Sometimes its too hard to obtain The rain falls to do some cleaning But with each raindrop comes a meaning Sometimes its pain or to cause sorrow Sometimes its to bring a better tomorrow And although there is no black anymore Things wont be as they were before No longer will there be any white Things will be different tomorrow night Whenever the rain comes out to play Dont think that you cant just pray And even though I can only see This thick fog surrounding me I know Im not alone today For someday the clouds will be blown away.
8:05 PM
Thursday, July 17
Selfish Never will I wish for death to ease the pain I will forever be selfish in that way I will always find someone else to blame And I dont care what anyone else has to say For I will always want him to sing to me I will always want him to smile in my direction I will always want him to be there with the spare key And I never want to lose this feeling of protection I want my Dad here with me today I want him here without the pain I dont want to need somebody to blame For I will only care what he has to say He has been there throughout my troubled childhood He was there supporting me throughout my pathetic punk stage No matter what stupid thing I did, he just said he understood My Dad was there for me no matter what was my age I love my Dad to death and back But never will I wish him death to ease the pain The only wish I will make for for the pain to just go away I love my Dad to death and back And for this readon, I'll be selfish like that
10:55 PM
Wednesday, July 16
Childhood I was a child, watching the fights Trying to ignore them, the screams in the night Burried in my pillow, sobbing with tears I would never have thought it would haunt my years But it was my parents that I tried not to hate They didnt realize the fighting and the pain that it made If only they would realize, take notice, and see That someone was crying and it had to be me For now I am scared to fall inlove, and fear to be alone Its too much to bare, all the pain that I've known I may not be a little girl, but there is one thing that I will say I cant forget these memories Because they haunt me everyday.
2:05 PM
Monday, July 14
just a lonely girl I am a lonely girl who has no life I wonder when this will change I see that I am stuck here I want to trade places with you I am a lonely girl who has no life I pretend that this is just a dream I feel like I am cursed I dont understand what I have done I worry about what my life will become I cry at night. in my room I am a lonely girl who has no life I understand I am better off than some I say that I am thankful for what I have I dream that one day I will get away from this place I try to make the best of things I hope I learn to appreciate I am a lonely girl who has no life.
11:17 PM
Sleeping pills Lying wide awake in the dark Taking a walk through the park Watching flowers bloom with the sun Reading a book just for fun Going on a low budget shopping spree Always hoping to find something for free Watching reruns on my TV set Chatting with people on the net Staring at the rain hit the ground Listening to every little sound Things like this were just fine And thats what i did when I had time
9:19 AM
Friday, July 11
faith days are short but nights are long i may be weak but i stay strong time does seem to go by so slow the light in me is just a glow tick tock is the only sound that i can hear as the clock goes 'round but I am strong and can handle this i no longer wait for some sweet bliss just take me away from this awful place i drew out my life, so let me erase! show me the stairway to heaven above get me away from the people i love no longer can i cause any pain someone please, take me out of my shame The prayers i weep each night in bed are the things my life should be instead but I am strong and can handle this so when i die, i want to be missed i praise the Lord every week in church I dont think its fair that I have to search I show my faith to neighbors and friends so why continue to make amends? I am strong and will handle this But Its hard to belive that a the Lord exists.
4:30 PM
Thursday, July 10
Graduation 2 Yearbook in hand And tears on my face Remembering the friendships That can never be replaced Friends sit by me On that last day of school Tears on all our cheeks Why is life so cruel? I found myself wondering why the second that I made friends The year was over and had come to its end Graduation practice was over It was almost time to say goodbye A tear dripped down my cheek And I began to cry This year was gone I had made some friends I knew I couldnt say goodbye So it was graduation, that I didnt attend.
6:47 PM
Tuesday, July 8
A meaning with each tear I am crying tears of pain my mind tells me im not to blame but i am crying these tears of mine as i look out the window, I wonder when the sun will shine i am crying tears of fear i look for help but no ones near i am crying tears of exhaustion i live my life with added caution I am crying tears of love I pray and pray for help from above But Still I cry for the pain that God sends Everytime I turn to him I only hope my pain will end I am stuck crying tears of desire I hope that one day My pain will expire.
11:30 PM
Monday, July 7
Reflections Mirror Mirror on the wall Am I the ugliest one of all? Why is it the mirror breaks, Everytime it sees my face? Why is it that I burn the eyes? Is it my face I must disguise? Just kill me now And kill me fast This mirror image must be my last Mirror Mirror help me please Cure me of this sick disease Take away the pain inside Somehow make my looks subside So one day the mirror wont brake I will be pretty when I awake Just make it end Make it stop Its the world I want to be ontop Mirror mirror ill go away And because you cant help, I wont stay The beauty is within, and I know that now I will prove it, but I dont know how. So Mirror Mirror on the wall Its time for you to take your fall Ill smash you up to bits and pieces And then its time, that my confidence increases.
10:08 PM
Sunday, July 6
My constant enemy A storm cloud hangs above my head It represents the tears ive shed 'cause every time my life seems better In the mail I recieve that letter Dear Naomi, things arent too good I would be there if only I could But yet again, things have gone wrong And all I can hope is for you to stay strong Its this letter that I always fear its this letter that brings that tear 'Cause every time my life looks good I know that I have misunderstood Never again will I ever doubt That no matter what the bottom falls out.
10:40 PM
Saturday, July 5
On the other hand... Tis' true I smile but i also cry i may be alive but inside, i died my mind may thump but it is still i may live but i lost my will i may breathe but i cant catch my breath i may sleep but i dream of death i may love but i also hate wheres my second chance? Is it too late? too late to change? and too late to be too late to reveal the real me
10:57 PM
Friday, July 4
Black Rainbow There are no longer any colors The rainbow left them behind So far along my journey I cant help but hide But the rainbow has turned black And the rain keeps falling down It used to lead my way But now Im left to drown I feel alone but Im okay Tis' true my life has gone astray But for now I am not dead The pains inside my head And one day, it will go The colors may not return My heart may forever burn But this black rainbow inside of me Wont be the lock, but it'll be the key The colors are gone They have all turned black And I am stuck in this crack But Ive lived like this for many years And my path has gone astray And unless someone helps me out I will forever, cease to pray.
11:58 PM
Thursday, July 3
Tick Tock The eyes of death are watching me Everywhere I go, they see But this is the life that I have to live I have no choice, but to forgive I am the only one to blame Its my fault that I live in shame Its my fault, I caused the pain I treated life like it was a game But my time is almost over and Im next on the list The worst part about this is that I know I wont be missed The eyes of death are watching me Watching my life crumble into a falling debris Family and friends, they watch in laughter I am gone, they live happily ever after.
10:39 PM
Wednesday, July 2
Empty My heart feels heavy Yet its empty inside Everywhere I go I look for a place to hide Days turn to weeks And weeks to years Im still in my corner Drowning in tears Look into my eyes I know what you'll see Beyond the tears of hope and destruction You'll find pain and misery Help me fill this hole inside Because if you dont, I'll sooner die Not by choice Its not my turn But through all this I have learned That being alone is not any fun And while being alone, Im the only one Help me fill this hole Thats burried deep inside Help me fill this hole I dont want to die.
10:57 PM
|