Not a fiarytale
Cloudy skies
Stars dont shine
Cool winds
Creep up my spine

Rain drops
Down to the ground
Pitter Patter
Is the only sound

All alone
tonight in my room
It really seems
That this is my doom

I am lost
In my life
I could end it..
With a knife

Rain drips
As tears spill
My Life
Goes downhill

A mere memory
Holds me down
Im sick of these tears
Im sick of this frown

I am stuck
With pretending
That this is my life
No happy ending.
Naomi S.J. || 2:28 PM

Echoes
I need you
Your not there
I cried
tears
Not enough
To show you
Exactly
What your missing
You ask
Why dont I believe you?
I say
You never tried
To stop the walls
From tumbling down
You never tried
to help me up
when i was down
I would have broke through
I would have been strong
I would have let go
If I could
Stop the echo
of you
Running
Fast
I go
Everything I dont want
You have
What I need
Coming back
Everywhere
I go
There you are
You ask
What did I do?
I say
You never tried to stop my life
From crumbling
You never tried to talk to me
When no one was around
I would break through
I would be strong
But I just cant
stop the echo
of you
I walk away
Dont leave
Im going away
Believe me
I will stop the echo
Of you!


Naomi S.J. || 8:23 PM

A painful memory
It hurts to breathe
It hurts to think
It hurts to move
It hurts to blink
The pain inside
You cannot see
The pain inside
Is eating me
The pain hurts
The pain tears
The pain can even stop my prayers
The pain can spread
Faster than you know
The pain will spread
And it will grow
Although the pain hurts
And although it tears
The pain is worse when no one cares.

Naomi S.J. || 12:12 AM

Tombstone
Im digging a hole
Im digging it deep
Im digging it wide
Im going to sleep

Im digging this hole
Thats now complete
Its for me to lay
From head to feet

Im digging my grave
For after my death
Im digging my grave
'Cause Im out of breath

I might use a gun
Or maybe a knife
Which is best,
To take my life?

I gotta' write my tombstone
But what to say?
I gotta' write my tombstone
And I gotta' write it today

I guess I'll say that Im to blame
I'll put my name
And say "The way I came.."

I've dug a hole
I've dug it deep
I've dug it wide
And now I'll sleep

Naomi S.J. || 9:32 PM

Naomi S.J. || 3:50 PM

Clear
Can you tell that Im in pain?
Can you tell that Im not to blame?
Can you tell that I always cry?
Can you tell that I want to die?

I thought it was obvious
But again, I am wrong
I thought it was obvious
That I just dont belong

Can you tell that I am scared?
Can you tell that Im unprepared?
Can you tell that I am weak?
Can you tell that Im a freak?

It must be obvious
That Its not meant to be
It must be obvious
By the falling debris
It must be obvious
I cannot see
It must be obvious
You cant disagree


Naomi S.J. || 12:12 PM

Raining on the world
the rain drips
my heart is numbed
the world keeps spinning
whats with my life?
why arent I winning?
have i done something wrong?
from the very beginning?
the rain drips
my heart is numbed
cant feel my soul
and my head keeps spinning around
the tears drip down from my eyes
all i can do is cry
because
the world keeps spinning
and im just not winning
even when Im gone
the world continues to be strong
the days pass by like theres no tomorrow
as i look around all i see is sorrow
because
the world keeps spinning
and im just not winning
lets see what the rain drops become
after falling and hitting the ground
its time for me to be found
the world keeps spinning
this is my life
and its just the beginning.
Naomi S.J. || 7:03 PM

Please stay
I should have told you
That the things I am feeling
Are not what you want to hear
The things your saying
Are just not easy
So let it out somehow
Hope is not all gone
It is not too late
Every breath I take I get this bitter sour taste
You promised that we'd stay
Stay really good friends
Your words give me a feeling that I havent ever known
Speak slowly
I am still learning
I know heart ache
My heart keeps burning
The things your thinking
Need patience maybe
Bliss is far away
Im sick of calling
And now Im falling
At your feet
Please stay
Hope is not all gone
It is not too late
Every breath I take I get this bitter sour taste
I knew it couldnt work
Work the way you'd hoped
Your words give me a feeling and I want it to just go
So please speak slowly
I am still learning
I know heart ache
My heart keeps burning
Naomi S.J. || 11:54 AM

Im horrible
You will never know
Just how sorry I am
I feel like such a bitch
You cant understand
I never meant to hurt you
To cause you any pain
I just wanted to make you happy
But now Im all to blame
Im so sorry for what i've done
And all the things I said
I thought out my decision
Ishould have said no instead
I never wanted to cause you pain
And now Im all to blame
I hope you dont hate me now
Because thats just something I cant allow
You wont ever know
Just how sorry I am
I didnt mean to be a bitch
I hope you understand
I hope you can forgive me
And I hope you will be fine
Im sorry for everything that I have done
And that is not just a line
Im sorry for the pain I have caused
And the things that wont take place
Im sorry for being me
I wish I'd leave without a trace


Naomi S.J. || 6:41 PM

Promise me
Will you always be there for me?
When I need you there..
Will you be there if I call you in the middle of the night?
Will you keep the tears from falling right down from my eyes?
Can you promise?
Will you promise?
Just please be there..
Will you take care of me?
Take my darkest thoughts, and make them bright for me?
Will you be there to make me strong, and to lean on...
When my heart is just, so cold..
Will you be the one, thats there for me most?
Will you be there if I call you in the middle of the night?
Will you keep the tears from falling right down from my eyes?
Can you promise?
Will you promise?
Just please be there..
Do you even love me at all today?
Will just anything take that love away?
When I need someone
Will you be that one, I need?
Can you promise?
Will you promise?
That you'll always be there for me...
Naomi S.J. || 3:26 PM

Pain
Theres pain in my heart
When will it go?
Why is it here?
I just want to know
Is it almost over?
The pain I feel inside
Is it almost over?
Must I run and hide?
When will it end?
When will I see?
Where can I hide?
From the falling debris
My heart is locked
But is it protected?
My heart is locked
But somehow got infected
Theres pain in my heart
Will it ever go away?
Why is it here?
My heart is astray.
Naomi S.J. || 8:43 PM

Blinded
I cant see
Right infront of me
I dont know
Im blinded
To the clearest things
I cant see
To the side of me
Heart is blocking
What I know must be
I cant see
Anything
Im stuck
In the dark
Oblivious
To the falling debris
I dont know
Where can I go?
I cant even see
Inside of me
Im scared
Of the unknown
I cant see
Its all I know
Im alone
And want to go
Far away
From this dark place
I want to see
I want it clear
I want my pain
To dissapear.
Naomi S.J. || 10:41 AM

Alone
Im all alone
Nowhere to go
I dont know
The silence
In the crowded room
The tapping pencil
So loud
I dont know
My heart is breaking
Cant you hear?
My soul escaping
Is anyone near?
The silence
Im screaming inside
So loud
The wispers
Worldwide
I dont know
Stuck in a corner
Wont return
No space in the world
No more concerns
Im alone
This I know
I'm gonna' go
Because my heart does burn.
Naomi S.J. || 10:28 PM

Utter Silence
Talking
Talking
Wont shut up
Speaking
Speaking
It's driving me nuts!
Yelling
Yelling
Shut your face!
Wispers
Wispers
Leave without a trace!
Voices
Voices
Its all in my head
Listen
Listen
I want to be dead!
Naomi S.J. || 9:24 PM

Downward Spiral
Things fell apart
The combination failed
You cannot comprihend
The downfall

In a dark place
Shadows lurking around
You cannot see
The downfall

No human contact for house
The feeling of boxed in
You dont understand
The downfall

Searching all directions
But no one can you find
You just cant feel
The downfall
Naomi S.J. || 8:29 PM

When will it end?
They say its over
But is that reality?
I know what it would be like
i'd have a sence of normality!

At first it was unbearable
And now its the same
I dont feel any different
Just alot of blame

I think alot
Day through night
To talk with Dad
But thats not in sight

When the day is over
I'm nothing but sad
I dont know what to do
Without my Dad.

((Just a thought of what it would be like if Dad dies in surgery next week. On..Friday the 13th...))
Naomi S.J. || 7:00 PM

Crimson Cry


Its always little things
That my life around me brings
Helpless amounts of Pain
Fear behind my smile

Ive lost all of the way
And left so many things behind
Along my precious path
Theres some things I should not hide

Theres a dagger in my heart
And I keep falling down
So lead the way
I need silence not love
Wheres the halo above my head?
Im sick of spinning around
I dont know
Am I alive or dead?
A daggers in my head
I cant help but cry.


Naomi S.J. || 4:15 PM

Just run away
I've gone away
I am losing sight
I am sick of just
Hiding out in the night

I look in the mirror
And I fear what I find
The face staring back at me
I wish it wasnt really mine.

Is the mirror broken?
Or is that just my face?
Is it possible to change it?
Or just leave without a trace?

Could I leave and not come back?
Could I run and never look back?

Would people even notice?
The ugly face that has now just gone
Would people even notice?
That I had left at the crack of dawn?

Goodbye to all,
For now its time,
For me to run
And for me to find
A place to go
And a place to stay
A place for me
To stay astray.

Naomi S.J. || 2:02 PM

Naomi S.J. >
Schaumburg, IL.
Writer/Reader/Connoisseur of music
email. || facebook.